FucFreaking Retarded
by DelilahTCullen
Summary: Bella does something REALLY stupid. Can you figures out what she did before you end? ONE-SHOT rated M for language
1. O Jeeze

Oh My _God._

How could I _do_ this?

_Why_ would I do this?

What am I going to _do_?

This is worse than blood.

or even breaking a bone.

or a stupid cut.

Worse than even _falling_ on my _face._

Worse than getting _yelled_ at.

What will _Edward_ think?

What will he do?

Will he leave me again?

Maybe just dump me?

Or smack me?

No, he wouldn't do that

He's too much of a gentleman.

Right?

_Right_.

But oh _crap. _

He'll be _MAD_.

What will Alice think?

What will she do?

Will she _help_ me?

Oh, No.

Will she _tell_ Edward to leave me

Will _she_ leave me?

What about _Esme_?

or Carlisle?

or even Jasper?

Will they help me?

O My _God._

What about Rosalie?

or my big bear brother Emmett?

Would Emmett help me?

How about Rosalie?

Nope, not Miss-I-am-a-bitch Rosalie.

But, will Emmett?

Nope, he's too stupid, with this kinda stuff.

He won't. He _won't_.

I know it.

What will Charlie think?

What will _Renee_ think?

What would Angela think?

Or Mike or Jessica?

Will they make fun of me?

or maybe help me?

Noooope.

I know it.

I just do.

What will I do?

What will I _do_?

What can I do?

I'm _dead_.

_DEAD_!

Maybe Edward will kill me.

Or maybe Emmett.

NO!

Jasper!

He'll probably kill me.

He's always wanted to.

Will Alice try to stop him?Probably not.

She's probably always wanted to kill me too.

Actually.

Everyone has, I bet.

Maybe, they'll all do it.

My family.

Damn.

Maybe I can reverse it.

Or even change it back.

and maybe -

most likely not.

It won't work.

I just know it.

Why would I do this?

ME?

Of all people in the world?

ME?

With the vampire boyfriend and his vampire family?

I'm so screwed.

Fucked.

Even better.

Yeah. Fucked.

It's the perfect fucking word.

I'm so fucking fucked.

I'm so fucking stupid

Fucking. Retarded

Fucking. Mental

Fucking. Special

But. Not in a good way.

Just. Fucking. Special.

Sigh.

What will I do without my _love_?

and his _family_?

My _family_?

If he leaves me...

He better kill me first.

or I will kill _myself_.

Fucking suicide.

I will make it bloody, too.

and nasty. Gruesome.

or I'll get someone else to kill me.

Yeah, I'll do that.

SHIT. WHAT AM I SAYING!!

Man, I'm losing my mind.

I guess it's true what they say.

CRAP.

I'm so scared.

I only have 4 hrs to fix this.

They're hunting.

All of them.

Again.

I am all alone.

Why?

Why did they have to leave me all alone?

I would not have done this if they were here.

Not all by myself.

In this hellhole.

_Without Edward._

Man, I _HAVE_ to fix this.

I just _have_ to.

I don't _really_ want to die.

You know?

I want to be a vampire, yes.

But that is different.

I'm not dieing.

Okay, I am but not the one-

SHUT UP. SHUT UP!

I have to stop talking to myself like that.

What do I do?

What can I do?

Maybe I'll wear a hat?

No. He will so take it off.

or maybe cut it off?

Hmmm... No.

Edward likes it too much.

He likes to play with it.

Just not like this.

Shit!

Why?

WHY DID I HAVE TO DYE MY HAIR?

Blond.

Of all the fucking colors in the world I had to dye it _blond._


	2. Oh No

**AN-I really wasn't planning on writing another chapter, but people asked me too, and an idea just hit me. ( I mean literally it hit me, in the eye) so here it is I hope you guys like it**

Oh shit.

Don't I _ever _learn?

Like really.

I'll just be stupid forever.

I know he loves it.

Well _loved_ it.

Its gone now.

And it's my fault

I don't even _know_ how I _did_ it

It just _happened._

This is probably worse than _last_ time

Cuz this was _his_

Well _I _am his. 

But this is different.

I got to fix it.

But I _can't_.

Its too hard.

Hell it ain't _fixable_.

I would have to get a new one.

But I cant leave the house.

Without Jasper being suspicious.

Because he's _taking _care of me.

While everybody else is hunting

They knew better than to leave me alone _this_ time.

But I _still _messed something up.

Dammit! What the hell is _wrong _with me?

I wonder why Jasper didn't come in when I did it.

It wasn't exactly _silent_.

And he is a _vampire_.

He probably just doesn't care.

Who would?

It isn't really important.

UGH!

But it is to Edward.

Maybe I could ask Jasper for help?

Naw. He'll just tell Alice.

And she'll tell Edward.

Right?

Yea, probably.

Shit, I _have_ to get it though.

I don't want Edward to get mad

Or _sad._

I can't _stand_ to see him sad

Yea mad I can take, but not sad

Oh just fanfreakintabulous.

I'm crying now.

I got it wet.

Now its worse.

Wow, they're coming fast.

I really need to fix this

Well get it fixed

But dammit!

Its just not _fixable._

That's how fucken bad it is.

I really fucked up this time.

Even worse than fucken last time.

Crap, man.

I have to get through this.

He won't _kill_ me.

He already said he wouldn't.

But he _can_ change his mind.

I can't think like that.

The most he will do is _yell_ at me.

At least I _hope _so.

_Maybe_ not even that.

I have to replace it.

But he'd still notice.

Its not like I can leave anyway.

Jasper wouldn't let me.

At least not alone.

And if I told him to come with me.

He'd tell Edward.

But Edward _did _threaten him…

_Fuck._

Well, I'm _screwed _anyway.

I cant replace it.

Even if I did.

He'd be able to _tell._

He's a freaking _VAMPIRE!_

With _super _hearing.

_Super_ sight.

_Super_…ummm _sexiness._

Yupp. Duh.

I _don't deserve _him.

Not even close

I just mess up _so_ much.

Its just freaking _sad_.

How much I mess up.

No normal person.

Is a klutz and fuck up.

So often.

Alice probably _saw_ it already.

Maybe _she's_ telling Edward.

Hell.

He probably _already_ knows.

I bet he can't _believe_ I broke his CD.

_I _can't believe I broke it.

His _favorite_ CD.

I _broke_ it.

_Shattered_ it.

Man, I am a _dumbass._

_At heart._

**AN - Did you guess like it? I know it wasn't really as good as my first one but I tried I hope u liked it peoples.**

**REVIEW! PLEASE!**

**It makes me happy.**


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